Unity Scripts

Blended Family Vows 

(Children’s name/s), you will have a share in this marriage, for your lives will be touched by the promises made by your parents today. Your participation will be needed to develop the bonds of this new family. We now ask you to promise that you will all join together to create a family of mutual help, respect, and support. We ask that you help to create a home and a way of life in which all of you may grow into the best people you can be.

In this spirit, will you pledge to continue to grow together and honor this new family for all the days that follow?

The children respond, “We will”.

Bride and Groom, as you give yourselves to one another in love and loyalty, will you also promise always to keep room in your new life together for (Children’s Name/s)? Will you commit yourselves to respect and honor them as individuals and members of this family? Will you pledge to cherish, encourage and tenderly care for them as long as they need you?

Parents respond, “We will”

(Optional jewelry/gift giving:)

As a symbol of the two families joined as one today, a special gift will now be presented to you.
As you receive your token of family unity, always remember the love that has brought all of you together and that will guide you and nurture you in the years ahead.

The Cord of Three Strands is a unity ritual generally chosen by couples who are performing a Christian ceremony. It is based on the Book of Ecclesiastes Chapter 4 Verse 12 , but if a non-religious couple wants to braid three cords during their wedding ceremony they can give a different meaning to the third cord. That would be called The Unity Braid.
If you prefer to just braid three cords together as a unity ceremony you can give those cords any meaning you want, or choose based on traditional color meanings.

Ecclesiastes 4: 7-12

7 Again I saw something meaningless under the sun:
8 There was a man all alone;
    he had neither son nor brother.
There was no end to his toil,
    yet his eyes were not content with his wealth.
“For whom am I toiling,” he asked,
    “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?”
This too is meaningless–
    a miserable business!
9 Two are better than one,
    because they have a good return for their labor:
10 If either of them falls down,
    one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
    and has no one to help them up.
11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
    But how can one keep warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered,
    two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

A Shotski allows the couple to celebrate just after their vows, with a shot of their favorite liquor.  The two shots are placed in the ski, and consumed simultaneously.   Larger shotskis can be used to include more people in this ritual.

Now that ___ and ___ have exchanged rings and made their lifelong promise to each other, they’ve chosen to symbolize the joining of their lives in a very special way.  With alcohol!  

You may not realize it but a good drink is like a good marriage in many ways…  Stay with me here.  It warms you from the inside, gives you strength and confidence, and helps you face difficult situations with a little bit of ease.  Drinks can be sweet, smooth, and sometimes bitter… Sometimes that drink gives you a bit of a headache, but you get over it.  

___ and ___, as each of you pour your drink, you are symbolically adding your own unique strength and character to this marriage. (couple pours the shots)

Now, I’ll need everyone’s assistance in cheering them on.  When I say go, we will all yell, 1, 2, 3, Salud/Cheers!  Let’s go!  

All shout, “1, 2, 3, Salud/Cheers!”

Congratulations ___ and ___, 



Creating a ritual space   

  • Calling in the Directions means acknowledging, welcoming, and thanking in prayer the energies associated with each direction/element and asking them to join in the proceedings to offer support and guidance.

Hear me Guardians of the East, the element of Air.
We call to you tonight with open heart and clear voice to offer thanks…
For the wind that brings inspiration and plays with our thoughts…
For the ability of communication that offers us with the power of understanding…
For the new dawn that greets us and offers a place to begin anew.
For the moments of poetry, song, and story that blossom within.
We thank you for the breath that gives us life.

Guardians of the South, the Element of Fire…
We offer our thanks for bringing us the long days of summer so that we may enjoy evening sunsets over the river…
For inspiring us to explore new expressions of our creativity while still embracing the arts we love…
For lighting the passions within, so that we may connect more deeply with the world around us…
For delivering us the strength and courage we need to open ourselves to all that life brings…
We thank you for the spark that burns within us all.

Guardians of West – Element of Water
We call you today to thank you for the gifts you give to our lives
Because water is always surrounding us
From our mother’s womb to the waves of the ocean
From a sprinkle of rain to an intense waterfall
The blood in our veins and the tears in our eyes
You give us emotions, love, dreams, imagination
You cleanse us and heal us
Thank you for being here with us today and always
We honor and we thank thee.

Guardians of the North, Powers of Earth,
We thank you for your gifts and blessings in our lives,
The food that nourishes us,
The homes we live in.
We give thanks for our bodies and their abilities to sustain us,
To feel pleasure,
And to dance upon the Sacred Ground.
We honor and thank thee,
Powers of Earth!

  • Smudging/Saging is a way to release negativity from both people and places.

During a smudge, leaves or stems from one of the four sacred plants are ignited.  The flames are then gently blown out to allow a billowy, smoldering smoke, which is wafted over the person, or area, either by hand or feather.  A person who is being smudged pulls the healing smoke to them and gently inhales. The ashes traditionally are returned to mother earth by disposing them outside on bare soil – it is believed that the negative thoughts and feelings have been absorbed by the ashes.

  • Using moonwater 

Making moon water is a useful tool in setting intentions and positive energy.  It is commonly ingested, bathed in, sprayed, and fed to plants.  During a ceremony, it can be poured in a circle around the couple and wedding officiant to create a safe space and manifest a powerful commitment.


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